I came into the great hall before Manwe and bowed low as I could until he bid me stand. Though others I have served in the many long years of my life, ever since that day it is Manwe who has been my king. I stood then to present those who had returned, and pardon was given to them. There before him they stayed knelt upon the ground with heads bowed in remorse of what they had done, and it was a grief to me to see such noble elves in such a shameful way. It was then that I began to say what I had been told by Feanor, and as I came to tell him the answers, Manwe wept and bowed his head.
Fearing I might waver at the sight, I continued swiftly to give the reply of Feanor, and when at last came to what he said of songs, Manwe's head rose and he began to declare that such songs should be sung and remembered, but at a great cost. It was silent then, and Namo spoke.
"And yet remain evil," said he, and all listened, for his words I soon learned were few and yet true he always spoke. "To me shall Feanor come soon."
How soon he did not say, but when pressed by his brother Irmo, he added to his prophecy, "Within my halls shall dwell the sons of Fingolfin and Finarfin, one day forevermore."
"What of the daughters?" I heard myself ask.
The piercing eyes of Mandos fell upon me, and he answered by saying, "Did they not slay kin as well?"
A cry escaped from the lips of Earwen, who was upon her knees beside her husband. He then took to comforting her, but her grief was nearly more than he could bear. Though my heart was broken already, I felt as if it bled once more to behold that sight.
I do not recall how I came to be on my knees before him, but my next words were a plea, heard by all within the hall. I put her before my pride, and before my very life. "Do not take her soul, do not keep it locked away. She is beautiful, and full of life and promise. When it is time for her, take my soul instead, that she may have her chance as she wished it."
Namo stooped so that we faced one another and took hold of my arm, and I his. "You need not bow to speak to me," he said for my ears only, and then to all, "It is not a decision for me to make on my own, but for those in council to debate. If it was my choice, I would grant your request, but the oath they have bound themselves to be not one that will be placed aside, and I fear she would be a danger if she were allowed to remain."
"She took no oath," spoke Irmo. "In her dreams, she has no desire of the light stolen, or of fighting such enemies as have fled from us. Her plans would take her upon a path separate from the others once she has crossed the Helcaraxe, if in fact she survives."
Mandos took up my gaze and held it for some time. "Will she survive?" I asked.
His answer was a question. "Do you love her that much that you would give all you have for her? Your soul, as you have said?"
"I would do it this moment if you asked it of me."
Placing his hand upon my head as Lord Orome had before, he closed his eyes. "You tell the truth with your words." His eyes opened, and he took with his other hand my other arm. "She would have been reborn, for she did not take the oath."
"She does not deserve death," I begged.
"Does anyone, truly?" Namo was not expecting an answer to this it seemed, and received none, and said, "I cannot take what is not mine to hold eternally in my halls. However, as she will not return to Valinor as soon as she was expected, there is a task before you if the council is to grant this request you ask. Her soul is yet complete. She will need to be united with her mate, for is it correct that I assume she is still cursed not to cross the sea?"
All looked to Manwe, still with his head bowed in grief. "For now," he said quietly.
"You are asking me to leave Valinor and take to her the true love of her life." I did not delay in my decision. "When should I depart?"
One hand he put upon his breast and said to me, "Moved I am by your words and your sincerity. If it is granted that this be your fate, I would offer a gift to you for your loyalty to her."
"There seems no reason the elf that is to be with her should suffer her departure," spoke Manwe softly from his throne. He looked up, surveying the group who had turned back, before settling his gaze on me. "Enough suffering has there been, let happiness be found for those who can manage such a thing." There was no disagreement and Namo nodded his head to Manwe.
Once more, Namo addressed me. "Your love for her exceeds the love she has for him, or even the love he will have for her." Namo's hand was pressed to my own chest and he said, "You are whole, and strong in your own right, but I would offer to you one who would love you equal to your love of her. One you will grow to love greater than you have loved another."
"How could I ever love another?"
Mandos, I believe, smiled. It was difficult to tell, for he still remained so serious. "Because you want to love another. You still hope to find a companion." I gave no answer, for I know he knew it was the truth. "You offered your soul for her. I will… borrow… a part of your fea, to be given to the one who will love you without question and worship you as you deserve." I felt something suddenly pull away from me - something I longed to keep. "Let go." The command was given and I felt my body relax. A sudden dizziness overcame me, but Namo kept me steady.
Leaning closer, he whispered so no other could hear. "On the night you finally learn to accept the one you are now destined to be with, you will be called by the name your father gifted with upon your birth."
"I have another name?" There was a mixture of emotion as I said this, for I was shocked at such a revelation, a little angry it had never been told to me, and generally overwhelmed by all that had recently happened. "What is my name?"
"When you hear it, you will know. You will not accept it at first, either, but I am sure you will be persuaded to." Namo said nothing more when I thanked him, nor when I told him farewell as I departed to prepare for the voyage ahead of us. At the time I thought perhaps I had offended him, but it was later that I realized he had no one to share his grief with, and of all the Valar, I believe when he is hidden in the shadows he weeps the greatest of them all.
